Tapping into the hipster

By Olivia Holland — “I am not a hipster!”

I have heard this declaration of self-denial many times since finger mustaches and Toms shoes became popular in today’s society. If you catch yourself saying this, put down the boxing gloves and stop fighting. You, in fact, are a hipster.

Although hipsters are generally acknowledged to be a newer, cleaner version of hippies from the 1960s, they really are not as they appear. Much of the illusion is due in part to the independence brought on by visiting local coffee houses and reading books written by hipster idols such as John Steinbeck and Ernest Hemingway.

Hipsters are against all things mainstream. Ever heard of that joke what is the best way to kill a hipster? Drown it in the mainstream.

There are some obvious signs to see whether or not you are a hipster. According to the Seattle Weekly, you are one if you wear flannel shirts, use Instagram, take pride in being smarter than someone else, wear glasses you do not really need, or wear ironic t-shirts.

With today’s mainstream music and fashion trends, it is easier than ever to tap into your inner hipster. This, though, is much to the members-only club’s dismay. Delete your iTunes account and purchase a Microsoft Zune music player instead. Download multiple albums of Norah Jones, Ray LaMontagne and Regina Spektor. Only refer to them as “this one singer you probably do not know.” Spend 50% on clothes at Urban Outfitters and claim they were bought at a cool, new thrift store somewhere no one has ever heard of before. You will get judgemental looks on the street but they are probably just thinking about how much they want to be like you.

As I write while listening to Mumford and Sons and wearing my new North Face jacket that I claim to “need” while hiking, I realize just how much of a hipster I am, and also how much of a hipster I have yet to become.

[Updated Aug. 7, 2017: This article has been reformatted for consistency.]